A very close girlfriend of mine is on the verge of breaking down. So we were sitting down and she started:

Girlfriend: My boyfriend is useless. He is 32 and he has no money. Okay, not that he doesn't have money but at this point of time, he is cashless

Me: Hmm? Well, he's own half a house

Girlfriend: So?? That is nothing

Me: You know he can't read through your mind, if you're unhappy with him you have to let him know

Girlfriend: He doesn't drive, his chicken dish is half cooked. Eww..Who would eat a reddish chicken. Yucks. And he doesn't buy me things, I have to chauffeur him around and I always buy him stuff

Me: Are you discontented being with him then?

Girlfriend:No but he just doesn't fucking care about me!! Sighhhhh...Btw, when you were with W, was he like that?

Me: I don't remember to be honest, it felt like ages ago. *shrugs*

I always think being in a relationship takes a lot of effort. I was (probably still am but I'd prefer to say not) in a relationship for 4 years. Our relationship was never smooth sailing just so because there was the whole drama with his traditional family for one, I think his mum lives in the 15th centuries. Respecting elderly people and individual's choice is a whole different thing all together, something which his mum will never understand. She thinks that women need to know how to cook and the first priority for a woman is to take care of the husband and family. It's fair enough if she thinks that way but she was trying to brain-wash me to follow her way. I was miserable. Not to mention his pig chauvinist elder bro who lives by the motto 'It's okay I can do that, because I am older than you'. Yeah, smart ass.

W treats me right, he loves me to death no doubt about that. He gives me everything I want. Almost everything. I can accept the fact that he hates my smoking habit therefore I quit. So I thought life was perfect (in my interpretation) and I can deal with the family because I loved him. It wasn't as easy as I thought it would be and it comes to a point where I don't fucking care anymore. I couldn't be bothered when his mum started criticizing me. I've came to realize that some people are just too fucking arrogant to compromise and I shudder to think if I were to be married to him. Women who are married into his family will be doomed because they're placed at the bottom of the family hierarchy, as corny as it sounds but that's the best way I can decipher that. And I always think being a woman is a privilege, we deserve to be loved and respect. After all, smoking is an individual's choice. Therefore, if I were to quit smoking again, someday, it will be for myself and no one else.

So I told girlfriend not to stress herself out too much, she's just been with him for 3 months. Well, relationships are never smooth-sailing, otherwise it wouldn't be called relationship. Given the 11 years age gap (she is turning 21 this year), there is a lot of hard work involved here. They don't move on the same wave-length yet it's just so amazing how at the very end it all works out just fine.